My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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