Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
