when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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