Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
