kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
