Me too!
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
