Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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