I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
