Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Randomize
