I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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