ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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