Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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