I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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