i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
