Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Swine flu is the new snow day.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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