My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize