Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
