I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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