C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize