hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
