Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
