apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
