Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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