it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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