Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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