Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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