I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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