With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Randomize
