My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize