theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Randomize
