i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Hippo gnu deer
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
