I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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