It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize
