listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize