I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
