dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize