We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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