Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
