When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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