New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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