I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
she told me i tasted like america
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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