worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
