i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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