I hate all girls vehemently.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
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