so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
