i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize