even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
