just come out here and I will go home with you...
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
