Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
