What a fucking waste of an outfit
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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