Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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