Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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